Rock and Roll Doctors


Ways Foreigner Misrepresented Having a Fever of 103

  • With all the can't-stop-feels-like-my-chest-muscles-are-going-to-burst coughing, no rendezvous could possibly be secret. And come on, with all that hacking, who'd have you?
  • "Check it and see" may involve anal [thermometer] probing.
  • The only sign you're going to get are a pair of crossed fingers warding you away as if you were a disease-spreading vampire.
  • Ain't nobody saving their love for you tonight. You're lucky if someone's saving your side of the bed for you.
  • No mention of chills, insomnia, lack of appetite, queasiness, or the inability to enjoy spending an entire day on the couch playing with the 360.


    You, my friend, are obviously in the throes of the dreaded Man Cold:


    Where's my SARRETT ON SURVIVOR content? I needs me some Static on this Zombie.

    I'm afraid that got packed in one of the boxes (though I can't say I'm personally upset about that particular loss).


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