Do you remember waaaaaay back in the first season of Star Trek: The Next Generation, when key members of Starfleet Command got taken over by parasites and started acting funny and eating mealy worms? Of course you don't. That's why I'm here-- to be the geek so you don't have to. But I'm starting to think those parasites have infested the marketing departments of the major soft drink companies, because the names of their new products have stopped making sense.
Mountain Dew Code Red. Mountain Dew Livewire. Sprite Remix. Pepsi Blue. What the hell? These names tell me nothing about the single most important aspect of a soft drink-- their flavor. It wasn't so long ago that Coke got it right, with the plainly named (if vile-tasting) Vanilla Coke. See how easy that is? Vanilla Coke. What's wrong with Mountain Dew Orange, or Tropical Sprite? "Livewire" is not a flavor, it's a safety warning. The parasites are just preparing us for their invasion. Pepsi Blue is people!
Posted by Peter at June 2, 2003 2:13 PM